Heya everyone, I’m running a new satirical news website called ‘The Tap’, which is a parody of the student news site ‘The Tab’. Might not be everyone’s cup of tea but please give it a read and a follow.
Being useless all your teenage life can prove pretty daunting. At school you could beat up that gawky kid Jonathan or push your way to the front of the lunch queue to desperately try and fill your boundless pit of insecurities, but now you’re studying Sociology at Swansea University after going through clearing and your options are looking pretty bleak. You didn’t make any friends at freshers, none of your flatmates like you, and even the Asian guy in your flat that no-one has seen for 3 months is still more popular than you. But wait! The solution to your sticky situation might be more straightforward than you think.
Start blaming elderly people. It’s really that simple. Of course they have nothing to with how much of a second-rate human being you are, but they did those bad wars in the past, they’re probably all right-wing, and none of them have Facebook so no-one will disagree with your bigoted agenda.
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